The Unromanticized Side of Marriage

Ask any successful athlete, pilot, wall street investor, chef, lawyer, dancer, doctor, Marketing/Advertising/PR professional, comedian, ... and they'll tell you it is all about timing. I think that the success of relationships is completely ruled by this factor as well. Here's a string of evidence to support my case:

1. Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City. If any of you ever watched even one show, you'll know that it's all about the seemingly endless quest for Carrie (et al) to find "the one." In the movie she ends up marrying a man she once dated but dumped because he couldn't give her what she wanted... (apparently she was ok being left on hold) and then he came around and proposed.

This introduces my concept of men vs. women in relationships. My theory is that women spend their whole adult lives searching for Prince Charming (who can blame them - girls grow up watching Cinderella and mature into the onslaught of successful RomComs littering our movie theaters). Men spend their whole adult lives avoiding being tied down - but eventually catch up in maturity and discover that relationships are way better than cold Chinese food and getting hammered at Hooters - and at whatever point in time that is - they decide to marry the woman they are with. No questions, no regrets.

For men, marriage is a loss of freedom. For women, it is a search for completeness. Many trials and tribulations later, it really all comes down to timing. When is the man ready?


2. Marriage is like the iPhone, you really don't think you need it until you see how it can change your life and what it can do. Once you have it you'll wonder how you ever lived without it.

Women in their 20s expect their friends to be seriously dating - and if they're not - they wonder why. Men in the their 20s expect their friends to be single and come to poker night, wing night, and be their wing men, and if they're not - then they're considered sissy and forgotten.

Luckily for us women, somewhere between 24 and 29 most of the men man-up and start getting married and all of a sudden the attractiveness of marriage becomes screamingly evident. After all, if all your friends are doing it, then it must be the right thing to do and the right time to do it.

So how do we avoid this biological sense of entrapment and un-romance?

You wait it out until the timing is perfect in your life.

You focus first on yourself - make yourself the best you that you can be, find out who you are, and most of all be proud of who you are so that you don't change it for anyone. Next you focus on setting up your life so that you are ready to share it with someone else. Work on finding a good career, settle down in a place where you want to live for a while, set financial and physical goals to work toward... then when the time is right, open your eyes.

I don't believe in one soul mate. I believe in there being many people that could share interests, life views, values, and plans. The key is to finding someone who wants you for you, during a time that you are ready and able to share yourself with them ... when the timing is right. It's not the who, but the when.

Do yourself a favor and stop dwelling on unrealistic Twilight-like notions and just enjoy life. There's a bigger plan for the universe than anyone could even imagine for themselves. Do your part and everything else will fall into place.

Note to all the cynics: Yes, I realize there are freaks of nature out there that are happily married and dated since they were 14 - the true "love at first sight" kind of couples.... I'm speaking in generalities here. More power to those people! :)

Peter Piper Picked a Pack of Pickeled ... Pictures of his food?

Everyone knows one but never admits to being one. They are the people who are obsessed with their food to the point where they feel the need to brag about it. We get it, food is delicious, can be complex, and is one of the few guaranteed joys of life. But I've never understood why people feel the need to take photos of their food and publish them, or describe in detail the wonderful meal they just ate.

[Unless that's your job. The one and only exclusion are chefs. By all means, if I could successfully capture the masterpiece of my work in a single snapshot, I'd post it all over the world.]

I'm not alone. The New York Times did a whole story on the seemingly new phenomenon. Maybe these people appreciate the art that is involved in the making of food, maybe the onset of 24/7 available technology has inspired it, or maybe these people are just not hungry enough to want to ravage the meal in front of them almost as immediately as they get it (much like me).

But the addiction becomes unsettling when I read ridiculous "news" tidbits like this: “It was a nightmare,” Mr. Garcia said, particularly because the unfocused pictures “were not the quality I’m used to.”" (One food exasperator who lost his precious iPhone and thus had to find other methods to carry out his obsession.)

One woman blogs 66% of her meals as a way to describe who she really is via food. Really? Even if you can find someone to read that blog, the behavior she is exhibiting seems unhealthy. What's the point anyway? I know people that feel the need to describe in detail the ingredients of a great meal they just ate, or how they went to a popular eatery last weekend. It might just be me, but I really don't care.

When it comes to food talk, I am very unromantic. I want more practical details. Tell me how you made it faster than before, tell me how you whipped something up with uncommon ingredients, tell me a new way to cook something.... hence the reason I like watching 'Chopped' or 'Iron Chef' over Paula Dean's homestyle cookin' (<--she irritates me almost as much as Carrot Top).

Clearly, you know my opinion on it. And that's all it is. But when it comes to food, I'm eating it, not documenting.

Laughing Out Loud

Here's a little list of funny things that have made me laugh recently:

1. Upon receiving a new stuffed animal toy, my little dog Bella rips the eyes out, humps it, and then rips out all the stuffing inside of it. Domination.

2. In efforts to not "waste" the extra coffee I brewed this morning, I brought two travel mugs filled to the brim to work. 3 hours later, I'm still working on the first one...

3. When I was wearing my ballet flats at work I moved so quickly down the stairs that I was borderline Riverdancing.

4. I thought about Topanga from Boy Meets World.

5. My blazer has foam shoulder pads and when I walk or shrug they crinkle. Pure class.

6. I ate the most bitter, wretched, sugarless, dark chocolate and almost spit it out. Then subsequently fell in love with it and finished the entire bar.

7. My boss listed one of his heroes as Bilbo Baggins.


The moral of this blog is to never take life too seriously. There is really funny stuff going on all around us and face it, life is never really that bad. Smile!! :)