Memory and Emotion

I always wonder why I remember seemingly unimportant things - like the Miss Mary Mack patty cake rhyme from when I was 7 - and forget very important things - like that I had a mandatory meeting at 8AM and it's now 8:25. As a psychology major I've learned that the best memories are linked to emotions.

Like one of my favorite quotes from Maya Angelou: "...People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel." Whether it's embarrassment, love, anger, humility, pain, joy, sadness, etc, if an emotion touches us deep enough, it's going to stick with us forever.

I remember my 8th grade teacher Mr. K was my favorite middle school teacher. Not because he gave easy grades or let us out of class early, but because he was kind when he didn't have to be. For example, at the time I was in his class I was a vegetarian and knowing how much it disheartened me to dissect a frog - he cleverly planned the dissection for a day when I was on vacation and he let me write a make-up essay. (Mr. K also saved me from a devastating typo on my science project... but that's another blog).

Kindness makes you fond of people. And kindness makes people remember you. It's the same reason we can't stop thinking about that attractive someone we met, how bad the board meeting went today when you couldn't answer any questions, how much it hurt breaking your arm when you were 3 years old, an old coworker you always hated talking behind your back, the glory of winning a little league trophy, falling in front of a big crowd, or how the smell of butterscotch reminds you of growing up...

So before you get angry at the overseas customer service rep on the phone, the driver that cut you off on the freeway, your significant other that came home late, or your best friend who made you feel stupid, remember that interaction may become a bad memory emblazoned in their brain like a branding on a cattle.

Just save yourself the effort and be happy; give them something good to think about. Practice random acts of kindness and smile, because after all, isn't that how you'd want to be remembered? :)